A Round – tuit

When are you going to mow the lawn? When are you going to wash the cars? When are you going to do this? When are you going to do that?It seems that I hear these questions on a daily basis. Usually they are asked right in the middle of The Jerry Springer Show or just before the afternoon nap. Apparently it has not occurred to my child-bride that my priorities are somewhat different from hers. Also it is fairly obvious that she does not realize that the seasons of the year play a large role in the completion of the above tasks.

Everyone is aware that one cannot mow while rain is falling and, if indeed, it is raining, then washing the cars serves no useful purpose. Other factors to be taken into consideration are temperatures. There are very few days during the summer months when performing these tasks does not require the use of an old sweat rag. I shudder to think of the image I project if I am observed seated on the old John Deere with a bar towel hanging from the pocket of a pair of designer shorts.

When the seasons change, it is certainly not feasible to scrape ice from the vehicles in order to wash them. I sometimes wonder about the rationality of my roommate. Besides, a little dirt on a car don’t hurt the running of it a bit and the horn will still blow. Therefore, my answer to the above inquiries is an empathic; “when I get a round-tuit.”
Well, this past week, the weather was such that I could venture outside for short periods and I decided to tackle the work that has bothered my wife for so long. While engrossed in these activities, I made a couple of amazing discoveries.

I washed both cars and found out that both were white.

I mowed the lawn and discovered that the house needs painting.

This simply proves a point. Getting a round-tuit just creates more problems.

Demijon